had a terrible day today... actually only one of the lesson... realli horrible.. imagine a student screaming at you saying he wants to continue lessons after he has pissed you off with those moves... idiot sia.. but like wat baby say... (he always know how to comfort me)... i was composed enough not to let all the vulgarities all fly out from my mouth...
i started my day quite ok... not realli la.. the first student didn't realli practise much.. the next few were quite ok.. then after that there's this boy i always dread going there.. preparing myself.. i thought lesson today was going to be smooth going. .then came the horrible thing.. he didn't want to listent o anything i say.. everything that i ask him to do or ask him to try.. one word just came out without thinking.. "difficult".. then after endless useless tries of asking him to play and do his work.. i walked off and said "i think we shall stop lessons here... i'll call your mom and let her know about this lesson..." i was not trying to threaten... maybe i didn't explain myself clearly.. i will call his mom to let her know that i have cut short this lessons and will give back the time next week cos i see no point in continuing classes with him... then the drama begins.. he started screaming and crying (a pri 2 boy.. eurasian somemore)... and shouting..."don't want i want to continue lessons now..." but i realli had no mood in teaching. then the maid kindly opened the door for me... i was about to go.. and this boy.. threw his books on the floor and said "don't go.. i want to have lesssons"... i was about to walk out and he came running over to slam back the door and locked the door.. with me still inside the house that is.... die.. i was thinking,, going to be trap inside.. so i just stand there like an idiot... stupid childish idiot... he continue screaming at his maid also.. that she made him angry... which she didn't.. think he was trying to say it was me but dun dare.... wat a coward.... so i gave him a short lecture and still have to continue class and act as if nothing is wrong... feels so wrong.....
thinking back the incident.. i think i'm the one who is to be blamed.. i was too childish to just walk away like this... so i'm the coward now... how stupid i was to behave like that.. but realli under that kind of situation.. realli there's no point in continuing the classes... so shitty sia.... hope i will be able to cope the circumstances next time... i was angry with him for not trying and complaining it was difficult.. u think i teach u very easy is it.... u think money just fall from the sky and i can live with it??? fat hope man.... it realli affected my rest of day. should i say on the way home.. that i blasted my radio in my car.... baby knows this... i will always listen to techno whenever i'm realli pissed off with something that happens.... but too bad i have no techno to listen.. so just listen to any loud songs that come by... wat ever it is.. i think i need to apologize to the student and his mom.. shall do it next week... if not... sure i die also... stupid me.. idiot me... what ever is left to scold myself....
wed is the big day.. yup.. i said that many times.. ppl who are interested to drop by and heard a beginner plays during public performance... its at esplanade concourse area.. (somewheree near the front door elevator)... at 7.30pm.. i will be starting the whole program.. but definitely not ending it cos i'm not that good la.... wat ever it will be.. baby realli did help alot in calming me down for the event.. hope he will be there to support me..... ^^v
babyfen woke up at 1:01 AM
GREETINGS !